Allow Duncan Alexander to explain how Sir Alex Ferguson not retiring in 2013 would lead to Jurgen Klopp at Manchester United, Fellaini at Spurs and Harry Kane at Everton…
Strap in everyone, it’s time for another glimpse into the other realm, a look at an alternative football reality and how one different decision could have sent the world in a very different direction.
This time, the scenario is: what if Sir Alex Ferguson had stayed at Manchester United rather than handing the throne over to David Moyes?
On The Totally Football Show this week, Duncan Alexander got out his big book of theoretical physics and took a look at one universe that may or may not run in parallel to our own.
Ready? Let’s begin.
“We’re back in the summer of 2013, Fergie stays on and recommends Thiago Alcantara to himself, so that deal goes through without many problems.
“The key thing is in real life Thiago signed for Bayern and did his knee that season, but he doesn’t in Manchester and helps United to the Champions League final, beating Real Madrid in the semis. They face Chelsea, Thiago masterclasses them and Fergie gets revenge over Mou for 2004.
“Meanwhile, Fergie’s deep state contacts tell him 2014/15 is going to be Jurgen Klopp’s last season at Borussia Dortmund, so he agrees to do one last season at Old Trafford to wait for Klopp. After his last game he actually speaks to the crowd in German: “Ihre Aufgabe ist es jetzt, sich hinter den neuen Manager zu stellen.”
That’s “your job is to get behind the new manager” in German. Both Fergie and Duncan used Google Translate.
“Roberto Martinez resigns from Wigan when they go down in 2013 but he waits for the right job. He doesn’t get the Everton job, he goes to Villa or somewhere. The key change here is that in summer 2014 Tottenham appoint David Moyes to replace Tim Sherwood, which means Mauricio Pochettino leaves Southampton to go to Everton.
“Moyes brings Marouane Fellaini to Spurs and uses him as a big-man-medium-man, meat and drink, feed off scraps combo with Roberto Soldado, which means a young Harry Kane doesn’t get his breakthrough season at Spurs and he joins Pochettino at Everton.
“They largely follow the Tottenham timeline in real life, all the way through to the 2019 Champions League final where this time they stun Thiago and Jurgen Klopp’s hugely successful Manchester United team to win Everton’s first ever European Cup.”
Woof. A butterfly flaps its wings in Trafford, and Everton become European champions. Extraordinary. Or at least it would be if this was real.
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